A Postmodern Seminary Vocabulary
When I came to seminary, I thought it would be neat
But I couldn't eat in the cafeteria; it's called the refectory
And I couldn't interpret the Pentateuch, cause exegesis is best
And they don't read the Bible here, they just call it the text
Cause here at seminary we love our vocabulary.
Don't try to say anything unless you have a dictionary.
It takes words you haven't heard to talk about these things.
For example, we all say "postmodern" but we don't know what it means.
Syncretism, papal schisms, and speaking of ecumenism,
The Trinitarian modalism of Iranaeus is an anachronism.
Let's deconstruct the Decalogue through redaction criticism.
And that would be postmodern, but I'm not sure what I mean.
Here at seminary we love our vocabulary.
Don't try to say anything unless you have a dictionary.
It takes words you haven't heard to talk about these things.
And we all say "postmodern" but we don't know what it means.
Don't call me "neo-orthodox" or I'll punch you in the mouth.
Defining terminology is all we fight about.
Conservative and liberal, multi- and cross-cultural.
Let's consider contextualization and be more pedagogical.
Here at seminary we love our vocabulary.
Don't try to say anything unless you have a dictionary.
It takes words you haven't heard to talk about these things.
And I keep saying "postmodern" but I don't know what it means.
Preach to me your homiletics and polity so you can use it.
Don't postpone my ordination cause I still can't spell "hermeneutic!"
J, P, E, D, Q. Deutero-Isaiah, too.
At least we get lots of free food, but is anyone else sick of soup?
Intertextuality might alter my pneumatology,
But so might being postmodern, and who knows what that means?
Here at seminary we love our vocabulary.
Don't try to say anything unless you have a dictionary.
It takes words you haven't heard to talk about these things.
And we all say "postmodern" but we don't know what it means.
©2005 Matthew Black. All Rights Reserved.
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